This round of chemo went smoothly. I took some anti-nausea meds before going into the office so I felt less sick this time. But, my anticipatory nausea is getting out of control. It sucks. Treatment seemed to go by really quickly. I sat next to this nice lady. Her port wasn’t working, so she was just chilling until it decided to cooperate. She was from up north too. We were talking about how everyone in the South has guns and that’s how they solve their problems. We both agreed that we don’t honk at people on the highway because you could get shot. She’s also a relief volunteer for the American Red Cross. So she spent a couple weeks in New York when Sandy hit. She offered me crackers and asked me to help her with her crossword puzzle.
It’s taking me a lot longer than usual to recover from chemo this time around. I still feel a little sick. Usually, I would have bounced back by now. I feel exhausted. But, I sleep so much. I forced myself to get up and get out this weekend even though I wasn’t feeling 100%. I’m not sure if that was a good idea. Sometimes I feel like I need to get out and stay active. But, then I’m not sure when I’m pushing myself too far and need to rest.
I nearly passed out at brunch with my line sister on Saturday. The wait was kind of long so we were standing in the shade outside. I just got really dizzy and my vision started getting blurry. It sucked. But, brunch was good and we ran into some other friends who joined us. Yum. We went to Buttermilk Kitchen. The four of us shared some pancakes and then we all ordered the chicken biscuit because that’s what they’re known for. So good! I spent the rest of the day in bed.
I still didn’t feel well by Sunday. But, I got out to have lunch with my grandbig. We went to a place called Oy! They had pancakes the size of my whole body. It was ridiculous. You could go there with a family of 4, order 2 things, and still have leftovers. What?! It was a true embodiment of what America is really about. We went back to her place so I could hang out with her 2-year old son for a bit. He is getting so big! And he talks so much now. Adorable. And then I spent the rest of the day in bed.
Still not feeling 100% today. So I stayed home and backed up all of my files to my personal cloud storage. I’m cool like that. I think I like staying busy because then I don’t have any time to think and my mind doesn’t wander.
This week started off with bad news. Sometimes I wonder how fair it is that I am on the winning side of my battle, while others are suffering so much. Some people don’t even get a fighting chance. There are amazing people out there who get the short end of the stick. Then, there are some people that karma just decided to skip over. What’s so special about me that I got a 90% chance of survival, while someone else only has a couple months to live? I wish that we were all on the same page. Cancer is a monster. It’s so unfair. I wish the world was a little smaller so that we could be closer to all of our loved ones. But, we’re across the country. And, I can’t travel. And, this sucks. I know it’s all very vague right now. But, we’re still trying to wrap our heads around things.
My Light the Night fundraising is doing really well. I would really like to see my team reach $1,000. That would be awesome! My sorority sister made our team t-shirts. They look great! Let me know if you want to buy one!
I guess that’s all for now.